I am not a product of my circumstances, I am a product of my decisions!

Today's affirmation: I am not a product of my circumstances, I am a product of my decisions! When I read this today it made me think!  We spend a lot of time worrying and telling ourselves what we cannot do because of what has happened to us or what we are going through.  We say to ourselves I can't do that because _____________.  So in so is so lucky because they can _______________ but they don't understand the struggles I have.  In reality there is not one person on the planet that doesn't have struggles or a past that doesn't include some hardships.  The choices we make regarding the hardships are what define who we are and what we can do!  We can sit in the place of I can't change this, I can't deal with this, I can't do this because of ______________ OR we can turn it around and think I can __________.  For example:  I can't buy a gift for my spouse because I don't have any money.  What can I do?  I can make a card and tell them all the ways they make my life special or all the things I am grateful for.  I could make a coupon book with items such as: good for one free back massage, good for one free car wash, good for one night of cooking dinner, you get the idea.  Perhaps it's a friend: good for one free night of childcare, good for one hour of cleaning, etc.  You change the I can't into an I can.  It works with anything but one that I hear over and over is I can't afford it or we don't have the money to...What can you do today to help the future?  You could make your coffee at home instead of buying it, you could cook a meal instead of stopping and grabbing something to eat out, you could pack a lunch instead of buying, you could save the leftovers and prepare them tomorrow instead of throwing them away, you could cut up your fruits and vegetables and put them in containers as soon as you bring them into the house so that they are easy to eat and quick to use so they won't go bad, you can take good care of what you do purchase so that it lasts longer, you could polish your toe nails and get rid of your acrylic nails, stop buying cigarettes, soda, alcohol, walk, carpool, or take the bus instead of driving and save gas and the list goes on and on.  It's a shift in mind set.  Every time you have an I can't thought ask yourself What CAN I DO?  Then focus on what step you can take.  When you do this over time you will feel empowered and less in the depths of despair.  It is about doing it consistently not about changing everything in a week.  We tend to want everything to happen NOW or we feel it isn't working when in fact little changes over time become habits that last a lifetime and make a HUGE impact!!  Today I challenge you to stop yourself every time you have an I can't thought and replace it with an I CAN statement and then do it.  Please take three minutes to watch this video and then tell me about choices! This is an amazing man who has had to make some VERY difficult decisions in his life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rr_5wDmX3kY
God Bless,
Nena


#getoffthescale #choices #ican #positive #changeyourlife #habits #decisions #circumstances #weightloss

Diet VS. Lifestyle...Do you know the difference between thin people and overweight people?

It's the first day after a major holiday!  Many of us ate candy, great dinner with family and friends, enjoyed many foods or drinks that we don't have everyday.  It's fine. It's called life.  People do this once in a while.  Don't beat yourself up! Do you ever wonder why some people are overweight and some are thin?  I know we've been told it's because of genes (even when some people in the family are thin), income levels, will power, etc.  There are many contributing factors but I think our mental dialogue plays a huge part in everything related to food!  There is one significant difference I have discovered...overweight people are on a diet and there's a reason the first three letters spell die; because that's how you feel like you're going to die.  As if you are depriving yourself of something.  You eat healthy until you can't stand it anymore or worse yet don't eat at all until you're so hungry you eat the first thing you see or anything and everything until you're so full you can't move and then you feel guilty and like a failure so you tell yourself one more time that you can't do it; you will never succeed so why bother and then you give up...until the next time you think I really should do something about my weight.  Thin people eat healthy 80 to 90 % of the time, it is called a lifestyle, so when a holiday or special occasion comes around or maybe they just have a desire for something that might not be exactly healthy they eat it but they don't feel guilty because they know it is a lifestyle.  They don't beat themselves up and say I've failed, I have to eat unhealthy now, I'll never be able to eat healthy again, NO they start making healthy choices the very next meal or the very next day and keep going.  Not even giving it a second thought because it's a way of life.  The trick is to eat healthy most of the time and then don't give up when you make a different choice, don't talk negatively to yourself, accept it for what it is...your choice to enjoy something you want and then go right back to eating healthy and tell yourself...I can eat this once in a while and go right back to healthy choices and everything will be fine.  Build yourself up, encourage yourself, and when you have those old negative thoughts STOP! (Ex: If you're thinking oh no I knew I couldn't do it forever, I knew I would fail.  STOP change your dialogue and say...I ate this, I made the choice, I control my choices, I will make a healthy choice at _________ (whatever meal is next) and everything will balance out, I CAN DO THIS, I AM DOING THIS!!  I AM SO WORTH IT!)  You are living a lifestyle you are NOT on a DIET because DIETs don't work; Lifestyle changes do!  If you would like help or have any questions please comment or email me for private questions at nena@getoffthescale.com
God Bless,
Nena
#getoffthescale #dietsdontwork #lifestylechange #healthylifestyle #weightloss #healthyaging

Do you need more time in your day?

Ever think...I need more time in my day?  I wish I had more time to________.  You fill in the blank.  I have found one REALLY great way to have more time in my day.  No I'm not Bewitched. I can't turn back the clock or add more hours to the day.  Two years ago I made a decision to make some changes in my life and one of the changes I made was to turn off the TV.  I didn't watch any television at all.  COLD TURKEY!!  I started reading instead.  I read a lot of books!!  Then my husband started to lose interest in television; maybe because there was no one to sit with and just veg.  After about 5 months we disconnected the satellite because why pay for something you don't use.  We started talking, doing things, and relating to each other.  I will tell you it was weird the first month or so because we were the people who automatically walked into the house and turned on the TV whether we were home alone or together.  Slowly but surely we started doing other things with our time.  I read some great books on organizing and started cleaning out small areas of the house and getting rid of stuff we hadn't used for years.  Cleaned our closets. Painted.  We both joined Bible study groups.  I started meeting once a month with some friends for a crafting group. We have joined organizations that we have interests in and in short we have started living our lives.  It is amazing what can be accomplished when you are not sitting in front of a TV every night and most of the weekend.  I used to watch so much reality TV and I was sucked in...what's happening with The Little People, Kardashians, Teen Mom, Kendra, Who's on Dancing with the Stars, you name it we watched it and our friends know we are HUGE NASCAR fans and there was not one NASCAR show on that we didn't watch!  Guess what?  There is nothing on Television that is worth the time we have now! NOTHING!!  I started to wonder how much time does the average American spend watching television every day? I did a little research and found out it is 5.11 hours per DAY!  But I found out some more interesting facts:  99% of American households own at least one television (we have 6), The average child spends 1,480 minutes per week watching television, the average youth spends 900 hours per year in school but 1,200 hours watching television.  The statistic that REALLY scared me was when they asked 4 -6 year olds to choose between watching television and spending time with their dad 54% of them said they would rather watch television than spend time with their dad.  That is not only scary to me but very sad!  If you are thinking or complaining that you don't have enough time in the day to do what you need to do or you can't relate to your friends and family the way you would like to, I challenge you to turn off the TV for a month and see what happens.  You might be pleasantly surprised.  I will tell you that I have no idea what the Kardashians are up to now and quite frankly I don't care because my life is so wonderful that it doesn't matter to me at all!!  I wouldn't trade the relationships I have for anything.  Think about the meaningful conversations you could have with your children, spouse, and friends.

God Bless,
Nena
#getoffthescale #television #time #makemoretime #freedom #coldturkey #stopwatchingtelevision

Who are you trying to please?

What are you doing on a daily basis in hopes that you will make someone happy?  Many of us struggle daily with worrying about pleasing others and end up living our lives for someone else.  We want people to like us, we want our spouse, parents, children, friends, etc. to be happy and to like us.  It is impossible to make someone else happy.  The ONLY person we can control is ourselves.  The person we need to please and make happy is ourselves.  Think about people you know or have known in your life.  The ones that you feel good around.  What made you feel good around them?  I think it was the ones who were positive, friendly, upbeat and saw the good things in life.  They weren't trying to please or impress people they were being themselves.  On the other hand think about people that you try to avoid, dread calling, don't like to invite over...what do these people have in common?  They are negative, drain you, remind you of every bad thing you have ever done in your life, bring you down, and make you start doubting yourself.  Everyday we make a decision about what kind of day we are going to have.  We do that with every choice we make each day.  We decide whether we want to look at the positive side of a situation or the negative.  It is a continual process all day.  The thoughts we have, the way we say things; for example: one thing happens in the morning and how many of us immediately say, "Oh no, It's going to be a bad day". Sometimes even before we walk out of the house in the morning.  We need to start listening to our inner voice and doing the things that bring us happiness, things that make us feel positive.  When we try to please others, many times they don't even notice, sometimes they don't care, and in the long run it makes us into someone we're not.  I'm not saying you shouldn't do things for other people.  Many of us get pleasure from helping someone.  What I am saying is that you need to stop and think of why you are doing the things you are doing.  Is what you are doing changing you?  Is it something you don't really want to do but you feel obligated or you are saying yes because you don't want someone to be upset or mad at you.  Are you going to feel resentment, or like they owe you?  Then you are not being your authentic self and you need to step back and ask yourself what is your motivation.
I lived for many years trying to please my parents, my friends, my husband, and my children and all it got me was 134 pounds overweight and they weren't happy either.  When you live your life listening to your inner voice and being true to who you are you will attract people that like you for who you are!  These are the people you want in your life because they are the people that will appreciate you and all the unique and wonderful qualities you were born with.  YOU ARE ENOUGH!  BE WHO YOU ARE AND LIVE A LIFE FULL OF HAPPINESS and BLESSINGS!
God Bless,
Nena

WHAT CAN I DO?

As I am working with people who are trying to change their life and lose weight, improve their finances, organize their lives, or just get healthy, I find one common thread...they are very down on themselves and quite negative.  Even some people who appear very happy and cheerful on the outside when they start talking about their issues they are very negative about themselves.  It made me think about myself and where I've come from.  I told myself some pretty awful things for years.  I wasn't good enough, I didn't do _____ as well as others, I wasn't as thin as I should be, I wasn't as funny, as kind, as good of a wife, or mother, you get the idea and you can fill in the blanks because I told myself many negative things over the years.  Then one day I surrendered to God and begged for help and told HIM if he would show me the light I would do everything I could to make my life a blessing to others.  He has led me down a pretty amazing path!  I am growing and learning everyday.  A few things I've learned are:
1. STOP the negative self talk.  As soon as a negative thought pops into your head STOP and replace it with a positive one; IMMEDIATELY!  for example:  If I thought "What makes you think you will be successful, you've been on many diets over the years and have never been able to keep the weight off before." I would immediately tell myself; YOU CAN DO THIS, YOU ARE DOING THIS!  I also had sticky notes around the house; the refrigerator, pantry, bathroom mirror, near my bed, even on the steering wheel of my car, with inspirational notes, bible verses or quotes to remind me how great I am.
2.  Each morning (or evening) make a list of at least 10 things you are grateful or thankful for.  I prefer to do it in the morning because it sets the mood for my day and then reread them at night before I go to bed but you can do it to fit your lifestyle.  In the beginning some days it was REALLY difficult to come up with 10 so I would write things like...I am grateful it is not raining, I am grateful I have a roof over my head, etc.  Now I can write pages of things I'm grateful for.  What I found out is that the more we focus on positive the more positives we have and the more we focus on negative the more negatives we have.
3. This leads to another VERY difficult topic for some of us, negative people in our lives.  I'm not going to tell you to get rid of people from your life but I will tell you in the beginning when you are trying to make changes it is very important to look at who you are spending time with and if they are toxic to you it is very important that you limit your exposure to them.  As you are trying to change and get better you need as much support as possible.  If you are trying to lose weight you clean out the house of any tempting food so that you don't eat it in a moment of weakness, the same is true for toxic people.  You need to stay away from them or limit the time you spend with them until you are stronger and able to handle the toxicity better.  You may find you don't want to be exposed to that type of toxicity at all and that is fine too but either way it is YOUR choice. That leads us to our next topic.
4. You make choices everyday and that is what decides what type of life you will have.  Making choices is the major difference between success and failure in anything we try to do.  You can make a positive choice or a negative choice for you.  You can live with excuses and I can't(s) or you can turn it around and ask yourself What CAN I DO?  Maybe you cannot clear out 15+ years of clutter in one day but YOU CAN clean out one drawer in the kitchen or go through one box and get rid of stuff.  If you do this everyday pretty soon that overwhelming mess starts to disappear and you feel empowered and successful.  Start turning your thought process around...every time you catch yourself thinking or saying I can't STOP and say what CAN I do?  Then do that.  It is amazing what an impact this one step can have in every area of your life.
What are you looking for on a daily basis?  Are you looking for the positive?  What you can do? How you can make a positive impact on your own life or are you looking for excuses to keep doing what you've always done because it's comfortable?  All you have to do is compete with yourself and make yourself better today than you were yesterday and you will see a huge impact on your life!!  It doesn't matter what anyone else is doing or how well they are doing.  YOU ARE ENOUGH!!
God Bless,
Nena

Is fear holding you back?

I had a huge Ah Ha! moment last night during Bible Study...we were discussing our daily devotionals and talking about how God sends messages through our thoughts and how HE wants us to live without a barrier around our heart and without fear.  All of a sudden a light bulb went off in my head and I started thinking about all the times I have held back for fear the other person wouldn't like me or think I was silly (or worse) for saying something.  All the times I've wanted to praise my children and let them know how important they are to me and that they are my whole universe for fear of them thinking I was smothering them or embarrassing them or having them feel uncomfortable.  Fear of telling my husband exactly how much I love him for fear of not hearing it back.  Fear of letting friends know how much and deeply I care for fear of them thinking I'm a little too emotional or crazy or having them not feel the same in return.  Then it hit me...how much better my life would be if I lived without fear and talked from my heart and let people know and quit worrying about rejection or getting hurt... God wants us to love, share, help and support each other on this journey.  He wants us to live a life full of HIS purpose with abundance and joy.  So I have made a decision that I am going to communicate my true feelings of love and compassion and express what is in my heart!  I want to let you know because when I see you, meet you, call you, text you or hear from you I don't want you to think I'm crazy or run in a different direction! LOL Seriously, I want to be able to live the true me and have you know how much you mean to me without holding back and having a barrier around my heart.  I want to live the way God intended me to live and I really believe he wanted me to express my love for people and I have a lot of love in me!!
I am praying you will release your fears and whatever may be holding you back and live your life filled with purpose and abundance. 
God Bless,
Nena